The big crush
When your crush has been saying ‘no to you for years and she finally says ‘yes and your blood boils with raw anticipation. Your head spins and a thousand butterfly’s sting at your bowels.
Together you enter the Giza desert pyramids and traverse the cave tunnels leading to the ancient underworld of catacombs. You hurriedly awake the sleeping mummies and excite them out of their sarcophages.
But your lust is too consuming, you drown in the shallow end of the red sea before Moses can strike his rod into the salty waters to create safe passage. And just like that, you and Moses never get to reach the promised land. Your crush eventually meets a certain Joshua and they both walk to the Canaan sunset without you.